The Last Deadly Mission


            
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Sen de gitme

Them

The Captive


            Mallory is France's answer to Buffy...sort of. Buffy was blonde;
Mallory has flaming orange-red streaked hair. Buffy dressed in pastel
skirts and flowery halter tops; Mallory wears red and black vinyl with
combat boots. Buffy hung around with two other high school students--geek
Xander and witch Willow; Mallory hangs with a mute, telepathic juvenile
named Talking Tina, a blue-haired drag queen and explosives expert named
Vena Cava, and the head of Commando Operations, Inspector Durand. Buffy
took directions from her mentor Giles; Mallory consults the Necronomicon.
Buffy was single; Mallory killed her husband with an ax on their wedding
night when she found out he was a demon about to sacrifice her. What Buffy
and Mallory do have in common is that they fight vampires and other evil
creatures.While speaking to a crowd in Paris, Pope Hieronymous I has been
kidnapped. The Ministry of Secret Services has called Anti-Paranormal
Commando Operations leader Mallory [Olivia Bonamy] to find him, much to the dismay of
Carmina Belladone, the Vatican's press attache. After watching a videotape
of the actual kidnapping, Mallory believes the masked kidnappers to be the
living dead, but Belladone thinks they were just terrorists in bulletproof
vests. She's not about to buy rubbish about "living dead" nor does she
like Mallory and her band of superstitious mercenaries.It's not going to be an easy mission. On their last assignment
fighting ghouls, Vena Cava wound up in a neck splint, and Talking Tina was
bitten by baby ghouls and now lies in a coma that the doctors say could be
permanent. Worst of all, Inspector Durand was killed. Before embarking on
the search for the Pope, Mallory invokes the spirit of her dead husband [Julien Boisselier]
who is now a wandering demon in limbo. He is able to identify the
kidnappers as evil spirits who have vowed obedience to Abbadon the Dark,
the exterminating angel who fell from God's grace during the Original
Fall. Rumors are circulating about him in limbo, demon hubby says. They
say that he's preparing to free the fallen angels and destroy all of
creation.Mallory gets a list of all supernatural events occurring in France
over the past five years. Plotting them on a map of France, she notices
that they form a pentangle. Using that pentangle, she heads south from
Paris in her pink and black hearse to a spot where 5,000 inhabitants
disappeared some 15 years ago. Along the way, she is surprised when a bat
lands on her windshield and it turns out that Talking Tina has possessed
it. Using her negative energy detector, Mallory is led to a gate in the
middle of a forest. Passing through the gate, she finds herself in another
dimension, so she gets back in her car and drives through the gate. When
she comes to a crossroads and has the choice of going to the Crypte des
Vampires (Vampire's Crypt) or the Relais des Loups Garou (Werewolf Inn),
she heads towards the vampires.Mallory stops at a gas station that sells Fresh A+. Talking Tina
detects telepathic waves coming from behind the station. Mallory checks
it out and finds several humans being held in cages. After releasing them,
she discovers that one of them is Father Carras [Adrià Collado], one of the Pope's
bodyguards who also disappeared when the Pope was kidnapped. Carras
doesn't know where the Pope is, but he decides to teem up with Mallory.
Tina takes over the hulking body of the gas station attendant, and they're
on their way again.Meanwhile, Vena Cava [Jeffery Ribier], who was left behind in Paris, has been
searching for Mallory with her locator. She found the gate, went through
it, and meets up with Mallory just as Mallory, Tina, and Carras are
attacked by hordes of cloaked ghouls. Vena jumps on top of a cement post,
aims her thick-soled boots, and shoots silver bullets. Well, she thought
they were silver bullets. Guess that the salesman lied. In order to get
away from the ghouls, the four Commandos jump into a well where they find
a secret passage. Labyrinth though it is, they manage to find the Pope [Laurent Spielvogel]
when Tina leans on a wall and it breaks through. While the Pope complains,
Carras releases him. Mallory notices the lack of guards and becomes
concerned that releasing the Pope was a bit too easy.Unbeknown to the Commandos, they have been being watched by the
vampire Lady Valentine [Valentina Varagas] and the succubus Morphine [Sophie Tellier]. Cautiously, the
Commandos head back through the labyrinth, looking for the exit. Suddenly,
they come upon a green dragonlike monster that chases them until they
deadend in a small room and the door closes, shutting out the dragon. When
they spread out to look for an exit, a wall of spikes drops down in the
center of the room, trapping Vena, the Pope, and Tina on one side and
Mallory and Carras on the other. While the Pope continues to kvetch, Vena
finds a lever under a floorstone and turns it. The wall begins to move.
It's going to crush Mallory and Carras. Vena turns the lever the other
way, and the wall stops. Then it begins to move in the opposite direction.
If not stopped, it's now going to crush Vena, Tina, and the Pope.Vena grabs her tube of blue lipstick and aims it at one of the other
walls. The lipstick explodes, creating a hole. First she pushes the Pope
through the hole. Then Vena follows. Unfortunately, the hole isn't big
enough for the gas station attendant to fit through, so Tina transfers
herself into Vena's body. The gas station attendant is crushed. While Tina
looks for another body to possess (she can't get into the Pope for some
reason), Mallory and Carras come across some writing carved into the wall.
It's in Latin and Carras can read it after making a rubbing. It tells the
story of how God locked the fallen angels in an abyss but Abbadon escaped.
A prophecy says that he will reincarnate as a human every 100 years "until
he is the one God entrusts with the keys to His Kingdom." Mallory and
Carras put 2+2 together and realize that Abbadon is none other than the
Pope.Separated from Vena, Tina, and the Pope, Mallory and Carras search
for them. They come upon a young man in chains. Carras wants to release
him, but Mallory notices the bite marks on his neck. As they fight over
whether or not to destroy the man, Lady Valentine appears. In front of
Mallory and Carras, she sinks her fangs into the man's neck and drinks him
dry. Mallory recognizes her immediately as the Pope's press attache, Carmina Belladone
("always sucking up"). Lady V then turns on Mallory. Mallory puts up a
fight, but Lady Valentine is immortal. Not even a pole through her heart
can stop her. Lady V captures Mallory and Carras and takes them to her
castle in the sky, where Vena is already being held in chains.The Pope is there, too. He explains to them that his kidnapping was
actually an elaborate ruse to lure Mallory to him. Now that she's out of
the way, he plans to destroy the world of sinful humans to make room for
the fallen angels who were created by God in His image, perfect and
immortal. Wanting her to witness his ascendancy, he has Mallory placed in
spiked handcuffs and suspended from the ceiling rather than destroying
her. Mallory reminds him that she never works alone, so the Pope/Abbadon
calls in Morphine the succubus, who can assume other personas. Morphine
metamorphs into Mallory, kills the Minister of Secret Services, and
convinces the Army General to send his troops to the Loire valley, leaving
Paris unprotected.Morphine then pays a visit to Tina in her hospital bed. Tina [Thylda Barès] has
managed to get back into her own body, so when Morphine shows up, they
have a telepathic showdown. Tina wins. Because her body is still weak,
Tina takes over the body of a young nurse and returns to help Mallory. In
the meantime, Mallory's demon hubby comes to her to enjoy the spectacle
but, perhaps out of a sense of guilt or maybe even love for Mallory, he
informs her that the mixing of their blood when she killed him has
actually imbued her with power. He compels her to use this power to free
herself. Mallory focuses, and the handcuffs break away. Mallory kisses
demon hubby. The next thing she knows, she is kissing Carras.Tina advises Mallory and Carras about Morphine killing the chief and
having the troops sent to the Loire. The three of them hurry back to
Paris, where the Pope/Abbadon is invoking the Powers of the Universe and
the Forces of the Ether to open the Gates of Hell, where he intends to
send all humans (which doesn't sit well with the vampire Valentine). On a
makeshift altar in front of him lies Vena, awaiting sacrifice. While
ghouls chant "Abbadon! Abbadon!" Carras and Tina sneak up. Tina sends a
telepathic message to the ghouls to kill themselves and to one ghoul to
cut the ropes that bind Vena. They then turn on the rest of Abbadon's
followers while Mallory concentrates on Lady V.Suddenly, a line of protective green fire goes up around Abbadon.
Carras pulls out the rubbing he made and reads, "He who crosses the Line
of Peril shall confront his worse enemy. Only inner faith will triumph
over this ordeal." Mallory looks to Carras, but he throws away his cross.
His faith has crumbled, and he cannot help. The deed falls to Mallory.
Concentrating all her faith, Mallory steps across the flames. An ax takes
shape in her hands. Suddenly, she is facing herself in her wedding gown
and herself as an executioner. "You can't escape the Evil inside of you,"
says one of them. "Good and Evil are two faces of the same monster," says
the other. They take swings at Mallory with their axes. Mallory tosses
away her ax and ducks. Mallory the bride and Mallory the executioner
cancel each other out, and now it's just Mallory and Abbadon face-to-face.The sky opens up, and Abbadon attempts to force Mallory back, but she
struggles to approach him. When it's apparent that there is no stopping
her, Mallory grabs the edict from Abbadon's hands and eats it, mumbling,
"Fut toi!" She tosses Abbadon down the stairs, the sky closes up, and
Abbadon and Lady V tuck tails and run. "I lost the battle, but not the
war!" screams Abbadon as he goes through a door into the interstellar
void, tumbling...tumbling...Epilogue: Mallory visits the grave of her demon hubby and gives him
back his wedding ring, releasing him from limbo (re: Necronomicon, chapter
112). Lady Valentine moves to the island of Izu, Japan and becomes a special
correspondent on the television. The Commandos head for Japan. [Original synopsis by bj_kuehl]
    

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