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The Golden Girls


            Would you believe, The Nude Bomb is based on the 1960s spy spoof television series Get Smart. In the film, Maxwell Smart (Agent 86) is called out of retirement in order to stop mad KAOS clothing designer Jonathan Livingston Seigle from exploding a bomb that will destroy every stitch of clothing in the world. KAOS demands a ransom in the amount of $10 billion dollars a month from the United Nations or they will detonate the bomb, making everyone nude.Smart's government agency, called CONTROL in the TV series, is called PITS, an acronym standing for Provisional Intelligence Tactical Service. There, he teams up with a new crew of agents to stop the nefarious plot. He is given a weapons specialist called Carruthers, modeled on Q from the Bond movies, a pair of teen genius geeks - Drs. Pam and Jerry Krubney - and three female field agents, Agents 36, 22, 34. Rounding out the team is Larrabee (Adams' cousin, actor Robert Karvelas), the only other regular cast member from the television series. Agent 13 - the spy who would be stationed in the weirdest places - shows up in an airplane toliet but as actor Joey Forman. The best idea of how to combat this challenge comes from Larrabee. He devises to render the nude bomb weapon ineffective by wearing food, are ineptly exploited through lame jokes and ill-timed sight gagsAgent 86 has only 48 hours to save the world from extreme nakedness. Several plot twists ensues, including a chase sequence through the Universal Studios' backlot tour - right through the Jaws ride - a trip to Innsbruck, Switzerland to interrogate international fashion designer Edith Von Secondberg, which leads him discover a mole in PITS. Testing every member of his team he finally reveals the Chief as the mole. After a high speed car and office desk chase,the Chief is captured and put in a hospital after an accident .This fiendish plot is a win-win for evil KAOS designer Norman Saint Sauvage, for he has created an indestructible but unfavorable fabric, which won't be destroyed. When KAOS agent Nino Salvatore Sebastiani confronts him he kills him intends to be the only supplier of clothing after they drop the bomb. Agent 86 uncovers that the unknown terrorist is St. Sauvage who is really a clone of Sebastiani. St. Sauvage launches the nude bombs and 86 attempts to capture St. Sauvage when he runs into a device that instantly clones the person. 86 follows him through it so as not to be outnumbered. A few more trips through the cloning machine and the screen is filled with Maxes and St. Sauvages. St. Sauvage dons a gas mask and releases a poison gas that kills everyone in the secret lair. He goes over to one Max who is lying on his stomach. Turning him over reveals an Agent 86 with a similar gas mask who leaps up to finish this villian off. After defeating Sauvage, Agents 86 and 22 join the real Chief and escape the lair as it blows up. The final image is of Max, Agent 22 and the Chief with their clothes gone due to the fallout from one of the bombs running down the road with THE END covering their ends.Those who are fans of the TV show should not expect to see this as a reunion film. The Chief is played by Dana Elcar (as Edward Platt had died a few years earlier), Dick Gautier as Hymie the Robot, and Barbara Feldon's character, Agent 99, are not even mentioned. Nor is there any reference made to 86 being married to 99.
    

Bill Dana

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